Tell the Truth
By Pastor Allan Pole
I worked one summer in a government office and found myself the only male in an office filled with females. One day, in a conversation with one of my co-workers, I noticed that she had a button undone on her blouse.
Another time, just before a ministerial meeting, a pastor I respect must have done an inadequate job of wiping her nose. She hopped out of her car and headed toward the door to where we were meeting with a significant booger hanging out!
What would you have said or done?
These simple, everyday incidents illustrate several important principles of Christian living and mental well-being.
God requires us to tell the truth (Exodus 20:16). He even says in Zechariah 8:16-17 that He hates when we do not speak the truth to each other!
Skepticism of leaders runs rampant in our culture. The truth has become so clouded that we need a long, complicated contract instead of a simple handshake. Our courts are plugged with people waiting to prosecute others because they did not tell the truth or keep their word.
Others benefit when we tell the truth.
This is especially true when we speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). Sometimes, love calls us to pray for people, asking the Lord to talk to them about the path they should travel. Sometimes, love calls us to speak out. When we are called to speak out, how we say it can be just as important as what we say. Words are a lot like toothpaste. Once we squeeze it from the tube, we can’t get it back in.
People are set free and grow with the truth (John 8:32). Does this mean we should share all truth with others? No – it may hurt the person and our relationship with them. They may not be able to bear the truth (John 16:12).
Acknowledge that there is a God and that He – not we – has the job of setting people straight. Let’s obey His promptings when He wants us to tell others the truth or be quiet.
We grow when we tell the truth. As followers of Jesus, we do not lie to each other since we have taken off our old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator (Colossians 3:9-10). We are to live and work with the awareness that He always watches and listens.
We aren’t always the ones who should tell the truth. Several young mothers approached me when I served as the senior pastor in another church. They were concerned that another one of the young moms dressed immodestly, and they wanted me to confront her.
I wrestled with this request because I didn’t want to reveal to this young woman that I even noticed. After all, “men of God” don’t have red blood flowing through their veins like “normal men.” Risking embarrassment and rejection, I eventually talked to her about it.
Unfortunately, it was not well received. If I could do it again, I would direct the young mothers to examine their hearts (Matthew 7:3-5), pray, and follow Jesus’ steps for conflict resolution in Matthew 18:15-17. Sensitive conversations are more emotionally loaded when they involve church leaders, and we should enter this minefield very carefully.
I confess that in the situations in the introduction, I did not tell the truth to my co-worker and fellow pastor. I ignored the embarrassing problems.
If I had another chance, I would have asked another lady to inform my co-worker that her button was undone. I would have immediately and privately informed my ministerial colleague of the monster-sized greenie lodged under her nose.
We need people who will speak the truth to us, and others need us to tell the truth. Speaking the truth in love grows healthy relationships!
Pastor Allan Pole
New Beginnings Church, Calgary Canada
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