Emotional Intelligence & Understanding the Times
Do you find yourself increasingly pastoring in a culture adverse to your worldview, trying to reach people with whom you have little in common?
Church leadership poses more challenges than ever right now. You need every tool you can get if you’re to succeed. One of those tools is an emotionally intelligent approach to understanding the cultural context of the day.
Fact is, understanding the times directly influences your ability to know what your church should do, the way you preach, and your impact upon the community.
I say that from two perspectives. The first is biblical and we will get to that in a minute. Another is my perspective as a reader of leadership literature. For example, one Harvard Business Review video shows that successful executives use “context” as a key leadership skill.
In other words, they spend time studying trends in their culture, industry, and within their organization.
More importantly, though, the Bible promotes understanding context.
“The sons of Issachar, men who understood the times, with knowledge of what Israel should do.”
(1 Chronicles 12:32)
So there you have it: understanding the times directly links to knowing what to do: which strategies to employ, which direction to move.
You can see a cultural sensitivity in Paul’s approach to his sermon on Mar’s Hill, too.
He walked around Athens and observed for a while before he entered the public dialog. He tuned in to their culture. When the opportunity came to speak, he used his observations to build a bridge of communication.
So Paul stood in the midst of the Areopagus and said, “Men of Athens, I see that you are very religious in all respects. For while I was passing through and examining the objects of your worship, I also found an altar with this inscription, ‘TO AN UNKNOWN GOD.’ (Acts 17 NASB)
In fact, Paul read the Greek poets and philosophers and used that information, too.
He is not far from each one of us; for in Him we live and move and exist, as even some of your own poets have said, ‘For we also are His descendants.’
Want to preach relevant sermons? You must understand how people think and build bridges to their existing mental mindset in order to communicate effectively.
Signs You Are Not Understanding the Times
However, if you’re not careful, the pressures of rapid and significant social change will drive you and your church inward and insular.
| in·su·lar /ignorant of or uninterested in cultures, ideas, or peoples outside one's own experience.
By the way, here are three (of many) signs that you or your church may be drifting down that doomed path of utter irrelevance:[i]
Any deviation from the style of worship is met with hostility and opposition.
The church budget allots vastly more money to the needs of the members than to outreach.
Very few members regularly share their faith with others.
Those are some signs your church may be drifting (or determinedly marching) into irrelevance and I am sure there are plenty of others. But what about you personally?
Frankly, I’m asking myself right now, “Do I personally regularly share my faith with others?” I’m not sure that I do that as often as I could. Is that apathy on my part? Or a matter of just not knowing what to say because I don’t relate to the people I encounter?
Understanding the Cultural Context of the Day
In her book, The Emotionally Intelligent Pastor, Dr. Jeannie shows that “learning the landscape” forms an aspect of relational insight. It is achieved by listening and observing.
She primarily applies that lesson to the micro-level: that every pastor should study the corporate culture of their congregation.
However, the same thing applies at the macro-level: we Christian leaders should attune ourselves to the wider culture of the day by engaging people who differ from us.
There comes a time to listen simply to understand.
We can do that by reading research (the Barna organization comes to mind), forming friendships with people outside our normal associations, by reading and listening to views and perspectives outside our normal information silos.
Personally, I read one online forum with views so foreign to mine that I sometimes leave frustrated and even furious (for a moment). But I do learn how others think very differently than me.
Why Understanding Cultural Context Is Emotionally Intelligent
We will never reach this generation, this culture, and the world of ours without love. Do we need good arguments? Sure. Do we need a coherent worldview? Of course.
But it all means nothing unless people feel we love them.
One of my college professors astutely observed, “Most people don’t distinguish between the feeling of being heard and being loved.”
Personally, I don’t think you have to agree with a person to communicate that you care about them.
However, we need to hear people, which means understanding their ideas, perceptions, and concepts. In fact, we must understand so well that we could make their argument for them. If we can discuss their notions with them in a way that shows we have truly listened, that will feel to them a lot like we love them.
That’s what makes understanding cultural context emotionally intelligent.
So I challenge us all to make an effort to listen more to those with whom we disagree and positions we initially can’t even comprehend.
Listen to understand.
The perspectives you gain will inform the strategies you employ, the way you preach, and the impact you have on hurting people around you.
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[i] Adapted from https://churchanswers.com/blog/the_inwardly_obsessed_church_10_warning_signs/
My husband, Bud, offered to write this week’s blog post. He wrote a thoughtful, pertinent article. Here’s what he had to say. Let us know in the comments what you think.
-Dr. Jeannie
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George P. Woods, Executive Editor of Influence magazine. interviews Dr. Jeannie on the Influence Podcast.